Let yourself be FREE of clutter!

It's the middle of February half way through winter and Spring is just around the corner. Before you know it this new season will be here. During this time of year I feel like a catapillar shedding my shell ready to unveil a beautiful butterfly. I remember when I was a teen my mom dreaded having me in her presence because I want to be transformed. A new exterior, new haircut, change of style, lose weight the list goes on. It's as if I relish in the pressure of the work it takes to have a total makeover. Am I depressed about my appearance? No. I get bored. Weird isn't it? And it doesn't stop there. Even in my living space I want to makeover get rid of the excess get creative. My husband laughs at me and thinks it's a big joke how if it sits longer than a day it's off to the donation pile. The excess of stuff bothers me I feel it's not necessary. Do we buy because it's a need or because it's a want? The next time you are out shopping ask yourself  "Do I need this? or "Do I want it? When I ask myself those questions most of the time I put the article back. Another tool I use is that what ever things I bring into the house I remove the exact amount. Think of ways how to recycle your belongings that you have no use for no more. Give them away to someone who does. Sell them. It gives you extra cash to replenish what you do need. Donate to your local shelter. There are many unfortunate people that could use your donation plus you can receive a tax receipt. Great for you!!!
The warmer weather is coming have a yard sale....you could even clean out the garage!!! Wow I am tired from all that cleaning tips and hope I have given  you inspiration to get de-cluttering.

Second time is the charm

Have you ever wanted to re-do a memory? Sounds corny? Well you know the one that turned out to be the worst mistake you could have ever had. For me I guess it would be getting married. I married so young it was my ticket to move out my getaway from my controlling parents. I wanted my freedom.  Later to find out that we eventually did divorce with three children. Although it was a huge learning lesson for me I had to experience that in order to appreciate the man I am with now. We all have had situations where we wish we could do all over again. Mistakes happen opportunities missed but doesn't mean we shouldn't be given a second chance. I want to get married again I am ready. I want to do so many things that back then I wasn't ready but now I am. Don't you? Maybe you experienced failure once doesn't mean it will happen again. This time make it your chance to rewrite history and make it right. Let me in on what is on your list to re do and I'll do the same.

Loving myself, naked and all!!



Outside show is a poor substitute for inner worth 
-Aesop

                                                                            
I remember just like it was yesterday going through puberty and developing into a young woman. Those years were incredibly stressful for me and trying to fit in.
As you mature and have children everything changes. Your body has changed from you bearing children and your body is no longer what you remembered.
You might be thinking well what's wrong then? I had
alot of remarks from my father about my weight.
I wasn't a plump girl but if I did gain and the same with my mother he made comments. Such as "big ass" or do you think you need that? It really made an impact on me and
still does now. I was always on a diet of some sort wanting to be rail thin and felt pressure from the magazines to be like that. It wasn't reality but it seemed that's what you needed to look like. New year's resolutions have come and again I vowed to lose weight. I am an emotional eater and when I stress food is my bestest friend. I have 20 pounds to lose and I am ready to take responsibility and action to do something about it. When I had my severe depression I was tinkering on the edge of becoming anorexic.
I was starving for control in my life and that was the one thing that I could. I could control my weight and how everyone seen me. I thought being that skinny and seeing my bones was normal. That isn't & I had to learn to love myself and be proud of who I am and all that I have accomplished in my life. I have had three children by c-section and stretch marks across my belly and that is okay to me. Those scars are mine from wanting to be a mom and I am humbled that I could. I marvel how my body is now at the age of 41. I am sure not as firm and tight like I was in my 20's but oh well. I like this stage I am a little plumper than I like but the weight will come off. My body is not a reflection of who I am in the inside. I am so much more than the outer part. I love to look at myself and say out loud five things that I like about my body. I like my eyes and so on. It helps boost my self-esteem and I feel good about myself. Finding ways to yourself where you are right now. Getting your sexy back is all in your attitude. Strut your stuff and give yourself some love. What do you love about yourself? Brag about it.

Will you still love me "authentically"?

In so many books I have read "be authentic and be your true self".
Really? What is living authentically anyway? I thought I was living alright to begin with. This past week I was in a rare mood hard to explain but in a funk. That's what I wanted to label it. The funny thing was that I wasn't miserable just melancholy and needing personal time. I found that during this time I had the best creative ideas I was writing more and it felt awesome. A friend said to me "Denise you are living authentically and that is awesome!!" I was. The flip side of it was that it can come off as cocky and arrogant or go ahead being called a bitch. If that is what living authentically is can people in our lives take it? Would they want to hear what you have to say or would you need to tone it down? I hate it when you need to act different with certain people because you don't want to hurt their feelings. Why do we do that? It's crazy. When this spark does show up I love it but do my friends and family love it as much as I do? Is it intimidating? Maybe so. I feel comfortable in that state and I want to embrace it more. I guess it's coming into my own and feeling that I am not willing to flip and flop for people anymore. It's alot of wasted energy. If people have a problem with it...it's their issue not mine and I know that. Can this side of our personalities work for us in our careers? I think so. You will attract the right people that will want to work with you because of the way you are. Let's embrace that side of us and learn to have fun with it. It doesn't have to been seen as a negative use it to your advantage. Why disguise it. I always love your feedback. Are you living authentically or in disguise?

I'm worth a million bucks!

I went to San Diego a couple of weeks ago to see Lisa Sasevich and she was talking about her mastermind group. She was discussing the benefits of joining and why it's the best business decision you could make.
I was totally psyched for this opportunity and wanted to partake so badly. As soon as she disclosed the financial investment I could feel my heart sink into my toes. The ultimate package was $100,000 and I felt so cheated. I had never been in an environment where women made that kind of money and didn't blink an eye at the investment. Right away my initial thought was "Are they calling home to ask their husband?" Propably not but that kind of investment was HUGE!!!! Yesterday I received an e-mail from Lisa talking about "Are you worth it?" The story hit home to me and made perfect sense. It's not so much investing the money and thinking she is making a killing but the investment is in you. I did it myself by taking the trip and making sacrifices to get to San Diego. The investment is YOU are you worth it? There is a bill board sign in my city that says "Live the life you were meant to live!!" The sign is for the casino of Windsor. Are you willing to make the investment in you and grow? As a coach I struggle with my rates and will people pay? Now I believe they will because it's not about me it's about them. We think it's about us but really it's not. If your client has issues with your rates it's their issue not yours. They are not willing to invest. I feel I am worth it and the time will come some day that $100,000 for a mastermind will happen. What is your worth?

Feeling out of Sync

Have you ever had that feeling where you feel in a funk? I feel this way today can't explain it and can't pin point it but pushing myself to get anything done. It could easily turn into a bad mood or I could shake it off and find a new perspective. I'll chose the new perspective. I am feeling that I take two steps forward and four steps back. Just when you think you might get ahead and get a break it's not what you thought it was. Today has been just that. I understand and know that when you have your own business it will be like that.
But some days are easier than others. It's the way it is.
I am treating myself with care today and not making everything a big deal. I notice that when I fall into this pattern I tend to do nothing and that makes it worse. It's o.k. to have days were you are not yourself and just be. I gave myself a pep talk and decided it might be a day to read, have a cup of tea, read a magazine or better yet paint my nails. Those are the times when the ideas flow when you take a break from your business.
Accept it and move on.

Faking it til' I make it...is it worth it?

You are guilty as much as I am for judgeing people and coming up to our own conclusions. Don't deny it you do!! Three years ago I belonged to MLM business and was drilled to fake it til' you make it. Even though you may be struggling and it's not going as well as you would like who cares fake it. I did. I faked it. There is a fine line between wanting to believe your successful or wanting others to believe you are. I faked it by the clothes I wore. People judge us by what we wear, the car we drive and so on. We really don't give a crap what education they have or how hard they worked to get where they are. I spent alot of money on suits to look the part but yet I was living a lie. Who was I kidding?  Myself?  To believe that I was successful? I am already and I don't need to put on act to have you convinced. I don't need your approval or needing it to feel that way. It takes so much energy to do that and I regret doing it. I have learned that I am who I am and take me as I am. If you have a problem with it there is not much that I can do for you. To what lengths will you go to be liked? Are they realistic? Are you afraid of being found out? Time to give up the act and be YOU!